trival...

Here are some questions but please be honest, what was the first thing that pops into your mind when you read them? ok.

let's begin...

Q. What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?

Q.What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?

Q. What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

Q. What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?

come on, i say be honest. how many of you thought of ....

answer just click

'Shake hands.'

'Coconut.'

'Bubble gum.'

'Firetruck.'

how many of you thought of others? hmmm....honest!

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man Vs Woman...

i find it funny and thanks to apple for the email. click on image for closer view or move your head closer to the screen. either one works.

i think all maths students will A= agree.

check out who is the discoverer. It's Adam...and i couldnt agree more too. muahahaha!

so think before getting hitch...*ahem*

this is true too...dun ask me who came to my mind when i saw this route map. oops!

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when blackie speaks english...

I got this via facebook. And it's so effing hilarious that i thought i just got to share to those who watch HK gangsta movie. yes! those Gu wak chai movie, or infernal affairs trilogy...or actually most of HK movies---somehow half of their theme or genre are black-triad (hak say wui) or gangsta related.

But imagine them speaking english - well literally translation...

here are some of the best ones ...

I know your mouse = 我識你老鼠 ！

You call me how to come out and walk in the future? = 你叫我以後點出o黎行？

I give you some colour to see. = 我俾D顏色你睇！(rainbow maybe)

If you have enough ginger, put your horse to me. = 如果你夠薑的話就放馬過o黎！

Face green green = 臉青青

How senior are you? = 你算老幾?

Do you big me? = 你大我呀? haha!!!

Do the world = 做世界 ( yeah do it man)

Big tea rice = 大茶飯 (go and order in the restaurant haha)

What the ghost are you talk? = 你講乜鬼? (classic)

Do you think me didn't arrive? = 你當我無到? (where?)

Wear grass = 著草 & I am wearing grass = 我著緊草 (run...)

Hold hold water = 楂楂水

I fear that you have teeth = 我驚你有牙！(check with ur dentist)

You have not enough class to talk mathematics with me! = 你未夠班同我講數！
(education is very important, kids)

ps. big sister ivy, how many have u used? hahaha...

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marriage pt 2

Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.

Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap!
__________________________________________

A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"

" Honey, "the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!"

There was a husband and a wife who had a very good sex life ... at least the wife thought so. The only problem with it was that the husband always had to have the lights off when they made love. So one day the wife decides to suprise him and turns the lights on in the middle of it.

She realizes her husband is using a cucumber!

She asks him if this is what he has been using their entire marriage. He replies "Yes." She becomes angry and starts screaming at him, calling him a "stupid cheating bastard."

He looks at her and says, "I'm the stupid cheating bastard? Explain our 4 kids!" (pic 1 & 2)

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yeah but ...

yeah but no but yeah but vs. am i bovvered?

imagine Vicky Pollard (little britain) & Lauren Cooper (catherine tate show) in a 'verbal' fight ...all hell!!!!!

corner 1


corner 2


they really should do a one-off, say maybe for comic relief or something or nothing, yeah but no but if they hv the time yeah, and dun be giving me evils for suggesting it, yeah but look at my face, i say look at my face, am i bovvered? face - bovvered? my face yeah! ain't bovvered.

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marriages...

for those married and thinking of ending ur single life, read this:

Girl: Will you love me after marriage also?
Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.

Doctor: your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping pills.
Wife: When must I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you.

God saw me hungry, he created pizza .
He saw me thirsty, he created pepsi .
He saw me in dark, he created light .
He saw me without problems, he created YOU.

One early morning a mother went to her sleeping son and woke him up.
MOM : "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school."
SON : "But why, Mama? I don't want to go to school."
MOM : "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go to school."
SON : "One, all the chilldren hate me. Two, all the teachers hate me."
MOM : "Oh! that's not a reason. Come on, you have to go to school."
SON : "Give me two good reasons WHY I *should* go to school?"
MOM : "One, you are FIFTY-TWO years old and should understand your responsibilities.
Two, you are the PRINCIPAL of the school."

What are the three fastest ways of communication?
Three fastest means of communication in the world.
Tele-phone
Tele-vision
Tell-a-woman.
You still want faster? Tell her not to tell anyone :-)

thanks to nurse apple for the above guidance/message *muahaha! (pic 1, 2)

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short post

saw & read something funny on the way to work this morning. U know those yellow thingy ppl stick behind their car. yes no? eg. if you read this you too near or wateva...

well i read this and it's brillant. it's where u put the Us & Is. genius! "U kiasu, I kiasi"

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men are like...

Received this from jinno, so i tot i shared with you guys and dolls... (of course it's one of those forwarded emails not written by her - i'm sure she can think of more if she put her 'head' into it-haha!) have a laugh.

Men are like Laxatives ... They irritate the crap out of you.
Men are like Bananas … The older they get, the less firm they are.
Men are like Weather... Nothing can be done to change them.
Men are like Blenders …You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
Men are like Chocolate Bars ... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
Men are like Commercials ... You can't believe a word they say.
Men are like Department Stores ... Their clothes are always 1/2 off!
Men are like Government Bonds ... They take soooooooo long to mature.
Men are like Mascara … They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
Men are like Popcorn ... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
Men are like Snowstorms ... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
Men are like Lava Lamps ... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
Men are like Parking Spots… All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

wat do you guys make of this? hmm... i remember reading the list of 'woman are like...', somewhere sometime ago. Let's compare or if you guys have a few comment, do tell.

ooo actually the opening of this email is really funny and so untrue.

For all those men who say, "Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free."

Here's an update for you: Now days, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY?
Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.

It's funny but i laughed out loud by the update: 80% against marriage. RITE...Lesbos!!!! But then again, some les want civil registration. Ironic! Wonder where they get the figures. Cos ALL my hetero girl friends or those i know are dreaming of & wanting MARRIAGE/BABIES. period!!! (*well if period stop means baby) tick tock!!!

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think...

Received this clever little joke or shall i say, way of thinking through my email from Jinno, and thought i shared it with you guys & dolls.

Muthu was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Muthu, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you hit one with your catapult, how many would be left?

"None," replied Muthu, "cause the rest would fly away."

Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking."

Muthu then says, "I have a question for you, teacher. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?"

Well," said the teacher nervously, "I.....I guess.....the one sucking the cone ?"

No teacher," said Muthu, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking too!"

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